Now, I gotta be honest, the context was a hot mess. One minute I’m looking at luxury calfskin loafers (and seriously, who even *needs* luxury calfskin, but that’s a rant for another day), then BAM! Celine Judy leopard print mule things popping up for almost ten grand. And then it’s all about “SANDALS for Women” and “BOOTS AND ANKLE BOOTS”. Like, MAKE UP YOUR MIND, CELINE!
But “Swiss Movement CELINE Shoe” kept nagging at me. It’s got that *je ne sais quoi*, you know? Like a whispered promise of… precision? Prestige? Or maybe just a really, REALLY expensive label slapped on something that *looks* like a normal shoe?
See, here’s the thing. I’m picturing it now: A Celine shoe, probably a loafer or something equally “classic” (read: potentially boring), with some tiny little gear tucked away inside. Like a miniature, super-fancy watch for your feet. Is that even *possible*? Is it even *necessary*? I mean, does a shoe *need* a Swiss movement?
I’m thinking probably not.
But, BUT… the *idea* of it is kind of hilarious and awesome at the same time. Like, imagine the marketing copy: “Experience the unparalleled precision and craftsmanship of Swiss engineering with every step you take. The CELINE Swiss Movement Shoe: Where luxury meets… walking. (Batteries not included.)”
Okay, I’m probably getting ahead of myself. It’s probably just a typo, a weird hallucination induced by too much online shopping and not enough sleep. Maybe it’s even a *knockoff* description, some dodgy online retailer trying to sound extra-fancy.
But part of me hopes it’s real. I want to believe that somewhere, someone thought, “You know what the world needs? A shoe with a little clock inside.”
